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Saturday, August 16, 2008

Indian Giver

Periodically ( i.e, related to my period), I think about moving to India. 
I would live in a beautiful open house, I would have servants to do my laundry, cook and clean for me and I would lead a graceful,  gracious life. How would I support myself? That's a little more hazy, but given that most American jobs have been outsourced to India I could probably get one of those jobs answering the phone for Lands End or LLBean. 
My life would be fabulous and I would eat delicious Indian food everyday that would be prepared for me by my servants who would rip me off behind my back because I'm a westerner but I wouldn't care because my life would still be so cheap. I could have loads of animals and my house would never smell like shit because my servants would take care of it. I could have tons of plants and they would all stay alive because my servants would water them.
 I could single-handedly bring back the empire all over again.








2 comments:

Pallex said...

Lets go! Ruby can come of course- we can get a motor bike with a side car and race around the country. We could hang out on the beach and do massage (I'll do energy massage) for food and gas. Maybe I can fulfill my life long dream of living in a cave while doing primo opium for the rest of my pain free life, or...not.

randomerror3 said...

err. well, you could also have your servants live the rest of your life vicariously for you altogether while you stay at home on the couch, here or in inja, and watch tv and eat culfi. fuckit. outsource yourself. who needs an empire. besides - they're not called servants anymore. They're called something euphamistic like "house keeper" or "helper" or "wife" or something.
Look, just stop distracting me with your totally deep writing, I have serious work to do goddamit...